How I met my husband...The story is about an adorable charming looking girl, Dbg Manka'a.,.

On a work trip from Tanzania, my next stop was Nigeria. In Port Harcourt, Nigeria, I happened to be taking a walk on the evening of April 23rd, 2014 when I encountered a stranger.

A tall, fair and good-looking guy called me but I moved on. Skeptical about Nigerians, I was only being cautious. Mr. Stranger was resolute so he walked up to me and introduced himself. I did same out of courtesy. Something about him kept me at ease.

He asked me out for a drink which I turned down. “Okay! Can I at least have you number”, he inquired? Few days later, he called and asked me out on a date. I made sure it was around the neighborhood where I lived and perhaps in the presence of others.

He came accompanied by three friends; two guys and a lady. They were as interesting and cordial lot. We later went out on a proper date seeing that I was getting a little more comfortable around him. After our date, he took me home and introduced himself to the family friends I lived with.

In time, we gradually developed a great friendship. He often called, took me out sometimes and showed me around. At the end of one of his usual calls one evening he said “I love you”. I went speechless. It became a repeated phrase whenever he called.

One day I unconsciously responded, “I love you too “. Before I could restrain myself, the word was out. He sensed some agitation and said, “its ok, sweetie. I understand”. Was I slowly falling for this guy? He invited me to spend some time with him at his elder sister’s place where he lived before I left for Cameroon.

While there, he treated me to a beans delicacy while I treated him to fried rice some days later. We watched “Act of Valor”. He said severally that he would love to marry me but I didn’t take him serious.

Once, while we were out with his friends, a meal was brought and one of his friends said, “Please, Mercy serve us this food like every good wife would do”. Guess what I said? “Who wants to be a good wife”? It came out unexpectedly. They all looked at me in astonishment and I felt embarrassed.

My stay in Nigeria was soon over and so was a friendship, so I thought. I didn’t feel the need to keep communicating with him. Nevertheless, he kept in touch via social media consistently to a point where I gave him my contact number. Calls came through so often.

Gradually, he began asking to speak to other members of my family especially my mum. I was amused at how mum was open with him as they spoke and sometimes laughed out loud. For one thing, he was concerned about keeping a distant relationship so he started trying to convince me to relocate to Nigeria. It was a huge decision to make.

I soon sought for mum’s counsel which paid off. It didn’t matter if he was a foreign to her, as long as it was love. Though she was somewhat skeptical about Nigerians, she later found reasons to think he was a good person based on how he made sure I was fine during my stay in Nigeria.

Still, I was battling with my views on men and marriage. Based on my dad’s rejection of mum and me when I was conceived, I grew up resenting marriage. I saw my father in every man. When I looked at men, all I saw was deceit and irresponsibility.

I felt men weren’t worth the pain. I took timeout to meditate and pray and picked up courage to face my fears. On the 23rd of September 2014, I headed for Nigeria on an invite from him to meet his family. With the love, warmth and hospitality they showed me, it suddenly dawned on me that this could be it. We went shopping and I got lost in picking out the things we needed.

He told me he will be back soon as he wanted to check on something. Then he quietly got to the Jewelry section where he picked up a ring he saw me admire earlier on. Once we were home, I was checking out some good food and wine we got when he walked up to me and whispered, “Close your eyes. I know you love surprises”. He held me close, slowly held up my hand, placed a ring on my finger and kissed me.

Upon opening my eyes, there was a huge smile on his face. I gazed at this dazzling beautiful gold ring planted on my finger. It was magical! And he went, “I was serious when I said I wanted to marry you. My heart beats for you”. All sorts of emotions raged within me.

I hugged him so warmly and said, “I love you”. I guess that was my yes! We made immediate plans to meet my family and to do the traditional marriage rights. Thereafter, we planned a court and white wedding. Our love was legalized in a court wedding ceremony on the 28th of April, 2015, one year and five days after we meet and our white wedding followed on the 12th of December, 2015.

I wasn’t very versed with Nigeria per say so my fiancé and his family (especially his sisters) did most of the planning. When it comes to monitory issues, I am a free spender but he is cautious and employs accountability with finances. I had never really fancied a very extravagant wedding as such though I wouldn’t mind having one.

I had always loved a very simple wedding with family members and few friends. Our wedding wasn’t what I had expected though in a positive way. There was a crowd! It was elaborate, yet not over the board! 10 years on, our family would have expanded with an addition of 3 kids; a girl and a set of twin boys (or a boy and a girl).

My husband is a twin and I desire to have twin. We hope to have our dream house, be successful in our careers, make positive impact in the lives of others, contribute positively to the well-being of our communities and go on family vacations around the world. Our family should be a model of a good and well-grounded family others can be inspired by.

We definitely hope to grow old together. Mother in-law is a strong spiritual support system to our relationship. Our parents made their own contributions one way or the other.

My bosom friends, sisters and prayer partners Nora and Eteng stood by me all the way. The Reverend, marriage teachers and counselors at All SAINTS PARISH, RUMUEME AGIP. PORT HARCOURT gave us their support. Our three-month marriage course was challenging but worthwhile. My views on men have shifted a great deal, yet it’s a gradual process.

If our love could blossom and lead to marriage, others should know true love isn’t just a concept. They too can ascertain such a blissful passion someday. We hope to make our marriage works and never to take this blessing for granted.

Edited by St. Taboh